Friendships with benefits seem almost idyllic – you have a close person to spend time with, enjoy each other’s closeness and sex – all without the obligations that come with a serious relationship. The truth is that friendships with benefits hide a lot of pitfalls “under a pretty cover”. Find out what the rules are for friendships with benefits so that a pleasant arrangement doesn’t turn into a drama full of emotional wounds, tears and lost friendship.
Clarify your expectations
Talk openly about what you expect from a friendship with benefits. Are you just looking for fun and a casual relationship? Or are you open to a serious relationship in the future? If there is chemistry between you, but you can’t imagine a future together, be honest. You will avoid possible disappointment.
Set boundaries
Agree on what is okay and what is not. Will you sleep together only occasionally, or will it be a regular activity? Is it just sex, or is it also about spending time together – trips, vacations, movies, dinners…?
Don’t let your feelings get in the way
What if one of you falls in love? That’s the biggest pitfall of a friendship with benefits. If the other party doesn’t feel the same way, you can leave the relationship with scars on your soul. It pays to agree on a rule that you will end the relationship if one of you can’t keep your feelings in check.
Keep your privacy safe
Trust is the foundation of any successful relationship. You share intimate moments together, so you should protect and respect each other's privacy. Don't share any details about your intimate life or privacy.
Don't fixate on each other
A friend with benefits is not the same as a serious relationship with a future together. If you're looking for a life partner, don't fixate on each other. Don't miss out on opportunities to meet and find the relationship you're looking for.
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Use protection
As cliché as it may sound, safe sex is essential. Be honest with yourself about your health and use protection responsibly – ideally a condom, or a combination of a condom and another form of contraception. An unwanted pregnancy would shake your life to its core. This is doubly true when it comes to sexually transmitted diseases.
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Expect an expiration date
Situational relationships don’t count on a “happily ever after” scenario. Friendships with benefits can last a few weeks, months, and in rare cases, even a few years. You have to expect that your relationship will end sooner or later, or gradually fade into obscurity – someone will fall in love, someone else will find a partner, someone will stop enjoying it after a while.
Chances of a relationship? Slim!
Friendships with benefits will occasionally develop into a serious relationship – however, this is more the exception than the rule. According to a survey by American sexologist, psychologist, and researcher Justin Lehmiller, friends with benefits (FWB) break up on average within a year. Only 15% of friendships with benefits develop into a romantic relationship. On the other hand, 57% of friends with benefits cut off all contact after the relationship ends, and only 28% remain in touch after the relationship ends.
For friendships with benefits to work, you need to set and follow rules. For some, this type of relationship can be a great solution – for example, after a breakup or in the meantime, before you feel ready for a serious relationship. However, the truth remains that some risks cannot be influenced – feelings are treacherous and can be difficult to influence.
If you are looking for adventure or distraction, a friendship with benefits can be an interesting option. However, if you are looking for love and security, it is better to look for a relationship that has a future.
Forget about false hopes
If you go into a friendship with benefits with the hope that your partner will fall in love with you over time, you risk painful disappointment. In this case, it is better to forget about short-term relationships. Speed dating can be a great way to get to know each other and have a serious relationship. On speed dating, you will meet several singles who are looking for a serious relationship in one evening. No lengthy correspondence, no security risks. If there is a spark between you, the moderator will exchange contacts with you. If it doesn't spark, you'll avoid an unpleasant face-to-face rejection. You can visit speed dating in Prague and other cities.
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