Dependence on a partner: How to get rid of the toxic bond and heal the relationship?

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Love goes hand in hand with the desire to always be close to the beloved counterpart. And so it can easily happen that you forget yourself in love. You put aside your interests and friends and subordinate your life to the wishes of your partner. In all this, you are losing your own self, and you are also creating relationship problems - especially if you expect the same from your counterpart. Where there is jealousy, reproaches, arguments and emotional blackmail, love slowly disappears. How to get rid of unhealthy dependence on a partner?

Pathological dependence on a partner

Can't function independently in a relationship? Do you adapt your life from the ground up to the needs and wishes of your partner? Are you afraid of loneliness, separation and losing your partner? Are you jealous when he spends time with other people? Then a red light should go on in your head.

We can develop an addiction to almost anything, it doesn't have to be only drugs, alcohol or cigarettes. There is a well-known saying that too much of everything is bad, and this is doubly true in relationships. Types of addiction can also include emotional dependence on a partner. It can manifest itself in different ways - both emotionally, physically and financially. An addicted partner often loses their identity, friends, interests and life goals because they focus only on their partner and the time they spend together.

How to get rid of dependence on a partner?

Uncover the cause of unhealthy addiction

Unhealthy dependence on a partner is often due to fear of loneliness, low self-esteem, wounds to the soul or traumatic experiences from the past. It can have its beginning in childhood or in unresolved life and relationship traumas. A toxic mother, a lack of parental love, childhood abuse or a previous relationship with a toxic partner is often to blame.

Searching the past can be very painful, but it is the only way to move forward. If you don't resolve these traumas within yourself, the dependent relationships will continue, no matter who is by your side. Don't be alone with such a complex problem, seek the help of a therapist who will help root out what the pathological addiction stems from.

Find hobbies

How to stop being jealous when your counterpart doesn't spend time with you? Have hobbies that you can pursue in your spare time. It doesn't matter if you sit at home with a book, start playing sports or attend yoga classes. It is important to have something of your own that will make you happy even when you are not spending time with your love.

Connect with family and friends

Go out regularly with friends or family for coffee, to the cinema or perhaps on a trip. You will gain new sensations, experiences and information, which you can then share with your partner.

Work on your self-confidence

Unhealthy dependence on a partner often stems from a lack of self-confidence. Work on your weaknesses that knock down your confidence. You start exercising regularly, go to the hairdresser, sign up for an educational course and develop your personality and new skills. All this will help you to increase your awareness of your value and strengthen your independence in the relationship.

Don't base your happiness on your partner

Stop expecting your partner to always fulfill your needs. Focus on yourself and do the things you enjoy and make you happy. You will soon discover that you can be happy independently of your partner.

Learn to say no

If you and your partner disagree in some area, don't be afraid to say no. You don't have to feel guilty or selfish, being able to say no is important in relationships. This is the only way to set and maintain healthy boundaries.

Step on the brake

Pathological dependence on a partner harms not only you, but also your relationship. Sooner or later, your partner, to whom you cling unhealthily, will begin to suffocate in the relationship. Allow yourself and your partner a little freedom. Recriminations, arguments, emotional blackmail and manipulation will not achieve anything anyway. On the contrary, you can lose what is so dear to you - the love and respect of a loved one. Talk to your partner and try to find a compromise that suits both of you.

Don't stay in a toxic relationship

An emotionally dependent person subconsciously attracts toxic partners such as narcissists, manipulators and other pathological personalities into their lives. Through your constant submission and emotional dependence, a toxic partner gains absolute control over your life. He can abuse his power at any time to his advantage and cause deep scars on your soul and deepen your vulnerability and dependence.

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Don't stay in an unhealthy relationship just because you fear loneliness and losing your partner. Although a breakup is a painful experience, without an end there would be no new beginning. Somewhere, a partner is waiting for you who will embrace you not only with love, but also with respect and esteem. You can meet your soulmate, for example, at dating evenings for singles in Prague.

TIP: Dangerous relationships: How to recognize a toxic partner right from the start?

Autor: Jakub Žwak