Emotional intelligence and lack of empathy: How does it affect partner relationships?

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The ability to express emotions and understand the emotions of others has a significant effect on the quality of our relationships. Feeling your partner's support, love and understanding is very important. What if this aspect is missing in your relationship? Low emotional intelligence and lack of empathy may be to blame.

What is emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence, known as EQ (Emotional Quotient), expresses the ability to understand and manage one's own emotions, but also the ability to understand the emotions of others. Understanding what the other person is experiencing is an important skill that should not be missing in healthy relationships.

Emotional intelligence helps us express empathy to our partner and communicate effectively.

Studies show that people with high emotional intelligence manage stress better, have better self-control, can keep their emotions under control, and are better able to establish and maintain healthy relationships.

A lack of empathy, on the other hand, indicates problems with the ability to empathize with the feelings and needs of other people. Inadequate development of emotional intelligence, experienced traumas, but also frequent spending of time in the online world are to blame. Stress and heavy workloads also play a role in reducing empathy. Lack of time, fatigue, a feeling of burnout and exhaustion... When you don't have time for yourself and experiencing your emotions, you can't have time to empathize with the emotions of others, or to establish deeper and quality relationships with people. A lack of empathy is also typical of selfish people who are not interested in understanding the needs of other people, narcissists, psychopaths and manipulators.

If you want to check how you or your significant other are doing, try the emotional intelligence test. If you find that you or your partner lacks the ability to empathize, you don't have to immediately run away from the relationship. Some skills can be trained, for example with the help of emotional intelligence courses.

In a relationship with an emotionless person

Under the influence of rose-colored glasses, it can sometimes happen that we overlook many things. We usually don't reveal the personality and character of a partner after three meetings. When infatuation fades, you may suddenly find yourself living with a person without emotions and without empathy.

There are several signs that will tell you that you are in a relationship with a person with low emotional intelligence:

Is your partner being rude to you or those around you? Does it happen to you that he doesn't even say hello when he comes home and immediately lies down on the couch with his cell phone? Or does it draw from your character or friends? Does he yell at you or speak in an unpleasant tone? Impoliteness can take many forms. From joking on someone else's account to inappropriate remarks and comments to completely ignoring other people.

Lack of self-reflection
People without empathy cannot reflect on the consequences of their behavior. They cannot empathize with others and have no idea how their behavior or words can hurt them.

Zero regrets
A person without empathy does not feel pity. And so don't expect him to apologize for his behavior, or at least hold his nose when you talk about his behavior.

Lying does not usually evoke any feelings of guilt in an unemotional person. And that's why he will lie to you if he gets some benefit from lying.

Zero emotion
Laughter, crying, nervousness, sadness, joy... People experience a wide range of emotions every day, which they express through gestures or facial expressions. People without emotions usually still have the same expressionless face in any life situation. An emotionless person feels almost no emotions. And where there are no emotions, there can be no relationship.

Lack of empathy - a big problem of the virtual world
As relationships move from the real world to the virtual world, lack of empathy is becoming a widespread, societal problem. Virtual communication takes place without non-verbal signals and emotional nuances, which are important for the ability and development of empathy, but also for the creation of deeper relationships.

More and more people are meeting and establishing relationships through the Internet and online dating sites, where they can choose from an abundance of men and women. Why try to maintain a functional relationship when there are so many other opportunities waiting for me? Unfortunately, this way of thinking is no longer rare and, according to psychologists, is behind the breakdown of many relationships. Better meet in the real world. If you lack opportunities, come to have fun, get to know each other and maybe even fall in love at dating evenings in Prague. Seriously, discreetly and without lengthy correspondence, which often ends up being lost anyway.

Autor: Jakub Žwak