7 tips to handle arguments and improve communication in a relationship

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Arguments are a natural part of any relationship. The problem arises when they become almost daily bread and gradually destroy the loving bond and trust between partners. Learn how to work with conflict in your relationship and learn how arguments can move you forward. Read the basic rules of effective communication in a relationship and progress to a higher goal.

Communication - the alpha and omega of a relationship

Communication is the alpha and omega of any relationship and the key to successfully resolving arguments. If communication is stuck, disagreements grow. Each person is unique in their opinions and life attitudes. Conflict occurs when your different opinions, expectations, needs, life priorities or values clash with each other.

Although conflicts between partners are natural, many couples fail to find effective solutions to the conflict. And it's no wonder that partners bring different patterns of behavior and life experiences into the relationship, which will significantly affect their attitudes and the way they communicate. Stress, fatigue, unclear communication or past experiences can also play a role in an argument. When arguments accumulate without bringing about a meaningful solution, tension rises in the couple and unnecessary problems arise in the relationship.

Frequent arguments in a relationship usually reflect an unfulfilled need for partners to express their feelings and sometimes their fears. When your partner does not perceive you or does not communicate with you, feelings of tension, frustration and misunderstanding grow in the couple, which often result in dissatisfaction in the relationship.

TIP: Solving the partnership crisis? Start with yourself first

Sooner or later you start asking yourself, “Why is he ignoring me? Does our relationship have meaning or is it already a passing relationship? And it is from this point that there is only one step left to break up. How to work with conflicts in a relationship to find the lost balance?

Stay calm

Although it is not always easy, try to remain calm and do not raise your voice during the exchange. Fierce emotions, shouting and outbursts of anger do not lead to an effective resolution of the dispute. It is devastating for a relationship when your counterpart begins to think under the rush of your emotions: "How to deal with a hysteric or choleric person?"


Listen to your partner to know what they need to tell you. Do not interrupt your counterpart and let him finish his point. If you're not sure how he meant his message, ask and don't jump to conclusions. Perhaps the partner meant his words differently than they sounded. Unfounded assumptions or twisting of words cause unnecessary damage in relationships and destroy mutual trust.

Be open and honest

Honest, sensitive and respectful communication will move you the most in resolving conflicts. Express your feelings and thoughts as you feel them inside yourself. However, choose the right words, do not use irony, insults, swear words, profanity or stoop to accusations. Instead of blaming and blaming your partner, talk about yourself and your feelings: "I feel that... I need you to..."

Don't go off topic

Stick to the core of the argument. Do not bring up old matters or topics that are completely unrelated to the current issue.

Look for a compromise

Try to find a common ground that will be acceptable to both. You can't win arguments because there are no winners or losers in a functional relationship. The goal is to reach an agreement that you both will be happy with in the end.

take a timeout

If the argument is heating up, you are in strong emotions and there is a risk that words will be said that you would later regret, give yourself time to relax. End the argument with the understanding that the next debate will continue the moment you manage to calm your agitated emotions and mind.

Choose the right place and time

Correct timing is very important during a partner fight. There is no point in arguing with your partner if you are stressed, tired, irritated or in a hurry to go to work, for example. Equally important is a suitable location. Don't argue in a store, restaurant, or other public place where there are lots of prying eyes watching you. Also, avoid arguments in front of children, who are very sensitive to their parents' disputes and could mark them negatively. Set aside a time and place when you will return to the problem and you will have the space to solve everything calmly, without stress and unwanted witnesses.

Make up

After an argument, it is important to be able to apologize if you made a mistake, were unfair, or said words that hurt your partner. Also learn to forgive because no one is perfect and everyone slips up sometimes. Apologies and forgiveness strengthen the relationship and strengthen the mutual bond and trust between partners.

Arguments allow a couple to grow

Even if we perceive arguments mostly negatively, they can lead to deeper understanding and improved mutual communication. Use the exchange as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and your partner. Also think about what caused the argument and how you can prevent a similar conflict in the future. Some arguments are necessary, others are petty and unnecessary - avoid the latter.

When exchanging opinions, do not get carried away by emotions and remember that the only key to successful conflict resolution is communication, respect and willingness to work on yourself. Learn to resolve conflicts constructively and without unnecessary emotions so that you can grow together in your relationship.

Title: 7 tips for arguments and communication in a relationship
Description: Arguments can be a boost to a relationship, but also a hammer. Learn the rules of effective communication in a relationship so that arguments strengthen your bond.

Autor: Jakub Žwak